The kind of marriage advice you should NEVER listen to...

Ladies, what's the worst advice you've ever gotten about marriage? Whatever it is, I guarantee it wasn't half as bad as the disgusting misogynistic B.S. attempting to pass itself off as "wisdom" in Melissa Gorga's new book, Love Italian Style.

In case you don't know, Gorga is one of the stars of Real Housewives of New Jersey and is married to Teresa Giudice's brother, Joe Gorga. I know--why in the world would anyone take any kind of advice from those wackadoos? I honestly have no clue. But apparently, someone out there thought it was a good idea (thanks guy!) and gave her a publishing deal, eventually resulting in the gem that is her new so-called relationship guide.

The gist of it? "Husbands want their wives to submit; wives want our husbands to dominate." Yup! Oh, and that's not even the most vomit-inducing quote by far. There's plenty where that came from!

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As can be seen in the excerpts from the book published on Jezebel, Love Italian Style explains how Gorga keeps her husband satisfied and urges other women to follow her example. But what the reality star reveals about her marriage is actually horrifying beyond words. 

Her anecdotes prove that her husband Joe is not only controlling, he's downright demeaning. He doesn't "allow" her to go on overnight trips without him, doesn't want her to get a job, has a say in what she wears, and has even gotten violent when Gorga does things he doesn't approve of. Essentially, he doesn't want her to be remotely independent or have any thoughts of her own.

But perhaps worst of all, is his attitude when it comes to sex. Anyone who has ever watched even one episode of the show knows Joe is constantly pawing at his wife and talking about their sex life. It's a little gross, but I never thought of it as horrifying until I read this, written by Joe himself (yes, he interjects himself into his wife's book…obviously):

Men, I know you think your woman isn't the type who wants to be taken. But trust me, she is. Every girl wants to get her hair pulled once in a while. If your wife says "no," turn her around, and rip her clothes off. She wants to be dominated. Women don't realize how easy men are. Just give us what we want.

Um ... excuse me?!?! Actually, you pea-brained gorilla, if your wife says "no" and you rip her clothes off, that's called rape. And yes, it's still rape even when you're married.

I don't know what's worse--that Joe feels this way or that Gorga, as a woman, agrees with him. As the book goes on, she only continues to spout all kinds of ways in which her husband "educated" her into becoming the perfect wife. Other examples of her wifely goodness, besides giving him sex basically whenever and wherever he wants it? She also has to be home when he gets home, she's the only one to do housework and take care of the kids (he refuses to ever change a diaper), and she has to maintain her figure in tip-top shape, as well as wear makeup every day.

Oh and the cherry on top of the cake? "Girls don't poop." That's right ... Gorga is so determined to maintain her Stepford facade that she poops only when Joe isn't home or LEAVES the house to do so. I can't even find adequate words to react to this, because it's so ridiculous.

The entire book genuinely just makes me sick to my stomach. I find it appalling that a publisher out there actually thought it was OK to make this available to the whole world. Gorga might have meant this as an advice book, but I truly hope that the only thing females get from her sad, sad story is what NOT to do in a marriage.  

Image via Amazon.com

Topics: love  marriage  relationships  celebrity couples