One marriage, two beds: How to coexist in the boudoir

¨He snores, moves around in bed, and doesn't let me sleep!¨ My friend Sabrina's only been married for 18 months, and sharing a bed with her husband Felix is not easy. She might be as crazy in love as the day they walked down the aisle, but for the two of them life after dark is far from a dream come true. Sharing a bed has become so difficult that this pair of lovebirds decided to sleep in separate ones instead!

¨Separate beds?!¨, I asked her. I couldn't fathom sleeping in a separate bed from the one I'd expect to spend the rest of my life with. How can she?! Of course, she says she lost so much sleep just trying to figure this one out that there was no other way. 

Many couples are deciding to sleep in separate beds. It this a new trend or just an extreme solution to an every day problem?


If like Sabrina you also dream of the perfect marriage, the secret might be to go your separate ways after the kiss goodnight... he to his bed and you to yours! Interestingly, it appears that up to 23 percent of couples admit to sleeping in separate beds, according to a study done by the National Sleep Foundation a few years ago.

Seeking peace at home (and more hours of sound sleep!), more and more couples are choosing to do exactly as my friends. The National Association of Home Builders is even predicting that by the year 2015, there will be more homes featuring separate master suites for this very reason.

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Could it be that it's easier to throw in the towel just like that when it comes to the things we can't stand about our significant other? Of course this sleeping in separate beds business doesn't have an easy fix (that is, unless you want to sleep with earplugs or make him wear some kind of a muzzle), but there are so many little things that lead couples to divorce.

A little (or a lot of) compromise would be a good place to start, no? If he has some habits that you simply CAN'T live with, let him know and ask him lovingly to modify his behavior. Of course you can only ask if you are also willing to change those of yours that annoy the heck out of him too.

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